Stuck In Neutral

Cindy and Linda leave for the basketball tournament. Vonda, Shawn’s care provider, babysits him when they leave. Shawn likes Vonda, although she is a little less patient with him, and basically ignores him just like everyone else. She paints her perfect nails, and the day flies by. Shawn has his first seizure and tours Seattle: “I feel relaxed, content. I float aimlessly; I am at peace” (103).

Later, Shawn wakes up to a car door slam and hears his father walk in the door. His dad compliments Vonda on her nails and asks about Shawn, and Vonda gets Sydney to sign her copy of his book. Sydney offers to stay the night with Shawn while still paying Vonda for her time, which Vonda thinks is great. Shawn realizes “that in all my years of being alive, my dad has never before stayed with me all by himself overnight. Yet suddenly he’s volunteered to take care of me” (105).

Shawn’s father enters his room and Shawn waits calmly, knowing there is nothing he can do. His father sits next to him and grabs a pillow, and Shawn remembers his father’s mention of suicide in his poem. His dad tells him he loves him over and over, explaining it as he makes both of their thumbs double-jointed.