47 pages 1 hour read

Mary Kubica

She's Not Sorry

Fiction | Memoir in Verse | Adult | Published in 2024

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Themes

Stalled Recovery From Trauma

Content Warning: This section of the guide contains depictions of childhood trauma, abuse, suicide, and mental health conditions.

She’s Not Sorry examines the individual’s journey toward trauma recovery by way of Meghan Michaels’s relationship with her patient Caitlin Beckett. Though far removed in time from the event that traumatized Meghan—the death of her sister—this relationship reveals not only that Meghan has not healed from Bethany’s death but suggests that she has resisted doing so.

When Caitlin is first admitted to the hospital, Meghan’s fellow nurses and Caitlin’s family believe that Caitlin attempted to die by suicide. The alleged incident “stirs up memories of [Meghan’s sister] Bethany and brings back all the emotion [Meghan] felt after she died” (52). Caitlin reminds Meghan of her sister’s death by suicide years prior even though she knows that Caitlin’s fall was not a suicide attempt. Therefore, caring for Caitlin challenges Meghan emotionally and psychologically. When she’s working with Caitlin and listening to the other nurses discuss her case, Meghan often “feel[s] sick inside” because Caitlin’s condition triggers her traumatic memories of the past (15). She tells herself that Caitlin “shouldn’t upset [her] any more than every other patient, but she does, for different reasons” (15).