I Am the Cheese

Adam is still on his bike journey. At the bottom of the hill, a silent German shepherd guards an empty house. Adam feels like the dog knew he was coming, and he rides his bike directly at the dog. As the dog tries to get in front of the bike, a yellow Volkswagen speeds by and almost hits Adam. The dog runs after the Volkswagen, and Adam bikes through the bare Main Street, feeling like the dog will always be after him.

In the transcript, Adam asks Brint if he’s a doctor and if they are in a hospital. Brint is evasive, and Adam admits the place doesn’t smell like a hospital—perhaps it’s a “private home” or “private sanitorium.” Adam doesn’t know, and he feels there are many things he doesn’t know. Brint wants to help him know more and returns to the “clues.” Adam hesitantly concedes that the dog might be a clue. This morning, Adam saw a dog on the grass. Brint identifies the dog as Silver—a German shepherd. Silver is good, but Adam hates dogs.

Adam’s dad was an insurance agent and had a routine life. He had glasses, a mustache, a new car every two years, and a Rotary Club membership. Mostly, Dave seemed like a normal dad but, when he discussed books, he became a deeper person.

Once, Adam and his dad were on the way to the library to check out Louis Armstrong’s “Twelfth Street Rag” (1927). Suddenly, Dave rerouted them into the woods. Adam felt like they were running away, and they ran into a monstrous dog. The dog attacked Dave, who cursed at it and fought it off with a branch.

Adam and his dad didn’t tell his mom, and this was a secret they shared. Brint asks Adam what Dave saw that made him stop and go through the woods. Adam doesn’t know what his dad saw.

Adam stops at a Howard Johnson’s Hotel at Routes 99 and 119. Although he has to use the bathroom, Adam doesn’t use the bathroom at the restaurant: There are no windows, and Adam can’t tolerate windowless spaces. He orders a hamburger, but it’s like a “rock” in his stomach. He has a headache and feels discouraged, so he tries calling Amy to lift his spirits. No one answers. After using the bathroom at a nearby gas station, he continues his journey, singing “The Farmer in the Dell.”

In the transcript, Adam tells Brint about Amy. They made out under the football stands, and he was in love with her. She had blue eyes, freckles, a crooked tooth, and “wonderful breasts.” She loved “mischief” and books, and they met when they collided in the library—it was a scene that could’ve been in a black-and-white romantic comedy.

Adam always felt shy and withdrawn—more like an observer than a participant—but Amy invited him to a “Number,” her name for pranks. They went to a grocery stores and filled a shopping cart before ditching it. Sometimes, Amy would only fill the cart with canned goods; other times, exclusively baby food. Amy advised Adam to “act natural” and like they “belonged there.” Later, from the parking lot, they’d watch the employees make a fuss over the cart. For a different Number, they breached a Holiday Inn and took away the “do not disturb” signs or switched them to the side that requested the hotel worker to tidy the room early.

Once, Adam went to Amy’s house and listened to her use the bathroom. When she came out, she told him that “farts” shouldn’t unsettle him—they’re a natural part of life. Another time, someone from Rawlings came to visit Amy’s dad. Amy told the visitor about Adam’s family, but the visitor didn’t know Adam’s family and he knew everyone in Rawlings. Adam lied and said he wasn’t born there: His family just lived there a little before coming to Monument. Brint calls the story of the visitor the “second landmark”—he says the “first landmark” is when Adam and his dad battled the dog in the woods.

The rain soaks Adam as he bikes along Route 119. Mud splashes him and the gift for his dad is thoroughly wet. A station wagon goes by, but it doesn’t stop for Adam. He calls himself “a nut” and loudly debates going back. He keeps going, singing “The Farmer in the Dell.”

In the tape, Brint believes they’ve “arrived” at the part where Adam grew suspicious, but Adam contests Brint’s belief, leaving Brint wondering if Adam is playing a game. Mostly, Adam feels panic—he lacks the capacity for games.

After the visitor from Rawlings, Adam didn’t confront his mom and dad about the truth of their past. Instead, while his mom stayed in her room and his dad mowed the lawn, he took his dad’s keys and opened the locked drawer on his dad’s desk in his basement office. He found his birth certificate giving his birthday as February 14 but then found another birth certificate giving July 14. Adam shook and shivered, but he tried to stay reasonable—maybe the Rawlings official made a mistake and got the date wrong.