Funny In Farsi

Dumas describes her experience of the San Francisco earthquake of 1989; she relocated to the area just after her wedding. When the quake strikes, she is preparing to take a shower. As she begins to evacuate the building, she crosses paths with an older woman of Eastern European descent. The woman is notably terrified and does not seem to acknowledge what Firoozeh is saying, which is an urgent suggestion that they should leave the building. She is able to find a single phone that is not disconnected, and she calls her parents. They do not initially understand the significance of the event and only later realize how life-threatening the situation was for their daughter. (This devastating natural disaster killed at least 60 people, destroyed infrastructure throughout the Bay Area of California, and caused at least $5 billion in damage.)

Dumas recalls a certain librarian she encountered while studying at Berkeley who had a very large nose. Dumas uses this memory as a jumping-off point for a discussion of the role of a woman’s nose in Iran not as a “breathing device” but as “her destiny” (161). At 18, she considers plastic surgery for her own nose and goes with her father to a plastic surgeon. She ultimately decides against the operation, much to her father’s delight. While at a motel waiting for her house to sell, she happens upon an interview on TV where she sees the librarian featured in a story. Dumas is surprised that the woman is a member of a nudist colony.

Dumas chronicles an experience she and her husband have while on vacation in the Bahamas. It is spring break, which means there are limited hotel options. As a result, they end up traveling to Spanish Wells, a more remote island in the Bahamas chain. They are part of only a small number of tourists staying on the island. As a result, they end up being asked to be impartial judges for the island’s beauty pageant. Dumas hates beauty pageants, but she agrees to be a judge. After the pageant concludes, Dumas and her husband, along with a very drunk Canadian tourist, pick the winner, who is “undoubtedly the underdog” (177). After the winner is announced, controversy ensues, and Dumas, influenced by her past struggles, becomes terrified that something terrible will happen to them. Much to her dismay, Francois isn’t the least bit concerned. It turns out that his reaction is more proportional than Dumas’s; nothing happens to them.

Dumas discusses the changing economics experienced by Iranians after the Revolution. What was affordable prior to it became totally unaffordable. As a result, Kazem becomes a self-proclaimed handyman. Dumas chronicles the many ways Kazem involves himself as the master craftsman of the family. With gentle humor, she recounts several of his disastrous home projects, such as installing new towel hooks with nails that are so long that they stick out through the bathroom door, resulting in “towel hooks on one side, medieval blinding devices on the other” (186). Her husband hides the tools before his father-in-law’s visits. Her father’s handyman interventions generally reveal his optimistic outlook on life. Dumas also draws attention to Kazem’s generous spirit and his habit of giving back to people in need in Iran; each year, he donates his full Iranian pension to meet the needs of people in his home country.

Dumas reveals her maiden name, Jazayeri. She recalls that her second-grade teacher, Mrs. Sandberg, is the first person she notifies of her decision to write a memoir; her former teacher responds with great enthusiasm and encouragement. She reflects on the generally positive reviews of her book offered by various family members who are able to read it. Dumas asserts that the main character in her book is her father. Before explaining his perception of the book, she outlines the rationale behind her parents’ skeptical response when she notified them she was writing a book. This is connected to her being a self-confessed “serial hobbyist” (191); she catalogs her multiple past obsessions, which include sea monkeys, sewing, knitting, baking for crafts—some of which end up as wreaths that weigh 40 pounds—and for desserts, and painting. Not surprisingly, her father, once he realizes that her project is indeed legitimate, becomes engrossed in its progress and often calls Firoozeh to remind her of details to include. He also minutely tracks the book’s sales record—how well it is or isn’t doing—better than Firoozeh does. She recalls her parents’ attending a promotional event for the book. They want to remain anonymous, but when the attendees realize who Kazem and Nazireh are, they converge on the pair, much to Kazem’s chagrin.